And again..

Here it goes; yet ANOTHER attempt at blogging.
(I am known to be one who gives up on projects/ hobbies quite quickly.)

This time it’s going to be used as a therapeutic tool, so hopefully I actually utilise the blog more, in a bid to ease my mental health issue. 

Mental health issues?” I hear you say.
I’ve been on the treacherous road of recovery for close to a year now. My mental health has always been unstable, since I was a teen, but I hit (what I thought was) rock bottom with an alcohol addiction. This is when I finally sought out professional help. 

*insert multiple detoxs, rehab, falls off the wagon, police stations, a court hearing*- I may come back to this stuff later, but for now I’d rather leave it as a fleeting memory. 

I was diagnosed with Dysthymia Depression and Borderline Personality Disorder. The moment I heard “Borderline” I threw myself into the worst train of thought, the only depiction of Borderline I had known was that of a socially awkward, overdramitic person. But when I actually read about BPD it was like a light bulb moment. So many things I had done in the past finally made sense. I knew it was going to be a long battle to stability, but it was something I was so excited to do, I was so ready you be normal again. Even though I don’t actually know what normal is for me? 

Anyway. There’s a quick reintro. I’m guessing most posts are going to be rambles; me trying to piece together my thoughts into words, verbal vomit in a bid to clear the clutter from my mind, that sort of stuff. 

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Oh hey there, I’m new here ;)

Well…
Hello there.. If anyone is even reading this?

Already, it should be apparent that I am new to the blogging world, & clearly have no clue on where to begin.

So I guess will start by telling you a bit about myself..

I am Ruby.

Well, Ruby-Jane if you want to be technical. I haven’t addressed myself by that name for many years now.
Not too sure why though? It is quite a nice name..
Anyways I am babbling. So, I shall continue.

I am 20 years old, living in the beautiful beachside town called Dromana, which is on the Mornington Peninsula, in Victoria.
I rarely travel far from my area, & that’s the way I like it.

These facts are fairly trivial to my ‘being’, the thing that is most important about who I am, is my beautiful son Kai.
I had him when I was 19. His father is not in the picture anymore & I can’t be bothered to begin to talk about that, but I’m sure if you continue to read my blogs, you will learn a hell of a lot about him.

Another thing that plays a big part in who I am is my family, & the fact that it is not the way it should be.
It’s just me, my mum & my little brother Bryn.
My dad passed away the day after my 12th birthday.
I think this event has played a dramatic role in who I am, what I think, what I do, & why..
As with my child’s father, if you continue to read my blogs, I am sure you will learn a lot more about this subject also.

Ok, that’s all I can really be bothered writing about now, but I do feel the need to put in a few key words that have played large roles in my life.

honesty is the best policy!

Or so they say…
You can connect the dots, if you wish.
– drugs
– alcohol
– promiscuousness
– weight
– depression

Ok, bye for now
🙂